When I was looking for a partner, I had created a list that allowed me to ascertain if someone was a good match for myself. This list is created by working with myself and looking at various factors to determine the list. If you haven't worked with me yet, here are some points to consider to work out your compatibility with someone:

1. Values and Goals: Assess whether your values, principles, and long-term goals align with the other person. Shared values provide a solid foundation for a healthy relationship. Avoiding assessing these in the early days can lead to conflict down the track. Make sure to consider many aspects including religious beliefs, financial beliefs, parenting beliefs, attitudes toward family, as well as their hopes and goals for the future.

2. Communication: Evaluate how effectively you communicate with each other. Open, honest, and respectful communication is crucial for understanding and resolving differences. In fact, one of the most important things to clarify at the start is how well they can articulate what they are feeling, what challenges they are dealing with and also how they feel about various aspects of life.

3. Compatibility: Consider whether you share common interests, hobbies, and lifestyles. While differences can add excitement, having some overlap in these areas often facilitates a deeper connection. Of course, how much you have in common and how much you have differing interests is a personal preference and something you need to work out before starting a relationship.

4. Emotional Connection: Reflect on the emotional bond you share. Do you feel understood, supported, and respected by the other person? Emotional compatibility is vital for long-term happiness. Ultimately, the level of emotional connection we have will determine to a large extent the quality of our relationship.

5. Trust and Reliability: Trust is the bedrock of any relationship. Evaluate whether the other person consistently demonstrates trustworthiness, reliability, and integrity. Trust is built over time and is confirmed on a moment-to-moment basis. This helps build a sense of togetherness and a sense of having each others back.

6. Mutual Respect: Assess how you and the other person treat each other. A healthy relationship requires mutual respect, where both parties value each other's thoughts, feelings, and boundaries. This is most important where you have differing views and are still are still accepted and supported..

7. Conflict Resolution: Observe how conflicts are handled between you. Constructive conflict resolution involves active listening, empathy, compromise, and a willingness to work through challenges together. If conflict ever involves yelling, negating, name-calling, minimising, or violence of any sort, then more harm is being done than good and you need to seek help as quickly as possible before irreparable damage is done to the relationship. Conflict should always be handled in a clean, responsible, and respectful manner to ensure a healthy and mutually agreeable resolution.

8. Emotional Well-being: Consider whether the other person supports your emotional well-being and vice versa. Healthy relationships should uplift and nurture each other's mental and emotional states. If the relationship is created an environment where it is easy to grow and become a better version of yourself, then it is easier to get in touch with, and articulate your emotions to each other.

9. Growth and Support: Evaluate whether the person encourages your personal growth and supports your aspirations. A supportive partner will be there for you during both successes and setbacks. In fact, the best moments of growth and support and found when challenges and adversity present themselves.

10. Intuition and Gut Feelings: Pay attention to your intuition and gut feelings about the relationship. Sometimes, deep down, we have an intuitive sense of whether someone is right or wrong for us.

Remember, relationships are dynamic and require ongoing effort and communication. It's essential to have open and honest conversations with the person in question to better understand each other's perspectives, needs, and expectations. Remember to be gentle with each other as we are all doing the best we can with the tools that we currently have.